Parenting Teens: Your Munchkin Is 13 Already?

In the last six months, my 12 year old… oops, Inot be like that.  If you're about to enter this
mean, my 13 year old, has grown about as manyradically cool group of parents of teens, then, please
inches.  His friends are wider and bigger, too.  Hetalk with someone who has "lived" through it.  Listen
ignores my cooing over him.  He snaps back with ato them.  Be heartened.  Be educated.  You're
big boy bite.  He's – like – different.next.
Ever feel that after parenting your child for a fullBe assured.  Parenting teens is not about losing your
twelve devoted years, you deserve a graduationmind.  Parenting teens is not about losing your cool. 
certificate of some kind from some kindly parentingParenting teens is not about freaking out.  Parenting
university out there, if ever such a one existed?teens is about you going to Parenting Graduate
 Well, just persevere one more month till yearSchool.   Classes are beginning in just a few.
thirteen.Seriously.  The most valuable thing you as a parent
You'll know it when it arrives.  It kicks in.  Like aof a munchkin can do now, before that fateful
baby in the stomach, only with huge legs andthirteenth year arrives, is meet with another living
powerful thighs. parent of a teenager (yes, there are a few alive as
"Surprise.  I'm a teenager now!" will be your kidwe speak).  Even better, meet with parents of
saying it without saying it.  Parenting teens definitely20-somethings.  (Per my definition: a "munchkin" is
is different.any child below the threshold age of being able to be
When my first son turned thirteen, he let me knowpinched and kissed on the cheek at any moment and
the shocking truth.  One evening, he was out andjust take it because they still like it.)   
about wandering with friends late at night, so I droveFind these living parents of teens.  They smile. 
looking for him.  Found him in the Block BusterThey breathe.  They walk.  They offer hope.
parking lot.  There he refused to get in the car toThey will give you the biggest "P-word" ever a
go home.  It was a P-T standoff.  A burst ofparent must know: Perspective.  Perspective on
stubborn.  A muster of persistence.  And I lost. teenagers.  Perspective on what works and what
Dizzed and dazed, I gathered myself again.  Thendoesn't.  Perspective on being patient, losing cool,
cried. fighting fire, failing at it all.  Experiencing its joys and
I was being kicked out of class.  I ended up havingsorrows.  They will give you a good perspective on
to finagle my way back to parenthood prep school. parenting teens with love.
Twelve years of parenting had just evaporated. That's the number one task for you who aren't there
For this reason alone, I believe that if you areyet: Talk to other parents of teens.  Listen and
parenting teens, you need a group of your own. learn.  Easy to do, just be a sponge.  Oh and don't
And desperately.  Many new parents enter thisworry.  You will be tested on the material soon
"teenager" thing every year, unprepared.  It needenough.