| The harmful effects of a drinker's alcohol addiction on | | | | unwanted advice, feels compelled to help, gives more |
| the family are undeniable. Living with an alcoholic | | | | than they receive, and then feels angry, victimized, |
| forces family members to adopt very predictable | | | | unappreciated, abused, and neglected. The more he |
| coping behaviors. In an effort to deal with the | | | | or she sacrifices, the less respect the drinker will |
| drinker, a family member may become | | | | have for him or her. There are some tell-tale signs of |
| "codependent". This is someone who becomes | | | | a codependent relationship. If any of the following |
| attached to the addict and his or her problems and | | | | questions apply to your current relationship and living |
| who feels terribly threatened by possible loss of the | | | | situation, you may be trapped in a codependent |
| relationship. Examples of codependent behavior may | | | | relationship: |
| include: | | | | Are you anxious before holidays or events fearing |
| The drinker makes a mess; the codependent(s) clean | | | | the drinker may disrupt them? |
| it up. | | | | Have you ever lied to employers, relatives, or friends |
| The drinker hides bottles; the codependent(s) find | | | | to hide alcohol use? |
| and discard them. | | | | Have you ever hidden car keys, or thrown out |
| The drinker is nasty; this feels like the | | | | alcohol to control the drinker? |
| codependent(s) fault. | | | | Do you ever find yourself searching for empty |
| The drinker is irresponsible; the codependent(s) | | | | bottles? |
| become more responsible. | | | | Have you ever felt embarrassed or compelled to |
| The drinker spends recklessly; the codependent(s) | | | | apologize for the drinker? |
| save frantically. | | | | Have you ever asked the drinker to stop or cut |
| The drinker threatens abandonment; the | | | | down on alcohol use? |
| codependent(s) cling even more. | | | | Do other family members fear or avoid this person |
| In this type of relationship, the codependent's own | | | | after they drink? |
| needs are generally neglected. Studies have shown | | | | Do you have money problems because of someone |
| the physical and emotional consequences of | | | | else's drinking? |
| codependency to include depression, anxiety, | | | | Do you feel if the drinker loves you he or she would |
| relationship dysfunctions, and cycling between | | | | stop to please you? |
| hyperactivity and lethargy. Physical problems can also | | | | Have you made threats, such as, "If you don't stop |
| often result from this self-neglect. They may include | | | | drinking, I'll leave you?" |
| gastrointestinal disturbances, colitis, ulcers, migraine | | | | Do you think if the drinker just stopped your |
| headaches, rashes and skin problems, high blood | | | | problems would be solved? |
| pressure, insomnia, sleep disorders, and other | | | | Are you feeling angry or perhaps depressed most of |
| stress-related illnesses. Along with these physical side | | | | the time? |
| effects, codependents often become hostile, | | | | If you answered yes to one or more of these |
| controlling, manipulative, and lay guilt trips. They yell, | | | | questions you may be living with someone who is |
| pour alcohol down the sink and want to know why | | | | dependent on alcohol, and you may have become |
| the addict is doing all this to them. But, regretfully, | | | | codependent. Fortunately, this type of relationship |
| they are always ready and able to rescue the addict | | | | can be reversed. The first step is to learn as much |
| from the next self-created disaster. | | | | as you can about addiction science and the effects |
| A codependent relationship causes one to feel | | | | of continued alcohol abuse on the brain. New, |
| responsible for the addict's feelings, thoughts, actions, | | | | comprehensive recovery methods have shown |
| choices, needs, wellbeing, and ultimately, the drinker's | | | | success in combating this illness so people can take |
| destiny. As a result, the codependent offers | | | | back their lives. |